Tuesday, March 30, 2004

The Three Minute Mile Man

I re-realized today for the bazillionth time that I often (read: always) set standards that I can't quite (read: at all) reach. I want to do so much and I want to do more than I want - which really means that I not only get frustrated by the lack of what I accomplish or achieve but I can actually beat myself up for stuff I haven't even thought about yet; that I'm somehow (read: the devil) convinced I should be doing.

I want to pray, eat, sleep, workout, makeout (read: Kim is hot!), order takeout, and chillout 25 hours of each 24 hour day. I am a self-improvement junkie and can never get enough of the constant "high" (read: "low") of tyring to become, do, and experience more. I could have 5% body fat (my body fat at 3 weeks (read: 3 weeks of conception)) and I'd want to get to 2.8. I could blog every day and I'd want to start a second blog day for select Tuesdays or some idiotic idea like that. I could pray an hour and still feel like the universe might possibly come to a screeching halt if I don't stop and hit my knees for the injured bird that is hopping outside my window (read: really lame hypothetical example).

I make a law producing, guilt providing Pharisee look like a substitute teacher who is nicknamed "Pushover" by his middle school students.

Does this make sense?

Jesus offers me an easy yoke and I consistency decline it for the one made of the concrete of my unrealistic expectations.

I'd like to write more (read: really I would) but I have to go for a run. I haven't ran in a while (read: sophomore year of college) so I better not try and over do it. What do you think? A 4 minute mile sound attainable? Yeah, that's what I thought too. 3 minutes it is!

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