Tuesday, June 14, 2005

Good Decision Mike...

I read the following headline today and couldn't believe my eyes:

Lawyer: Jackson Won't Share a Bed with Kids

SANTA MARIA, Calif. - Michael Jackson's lawyer said Tuesday that the pop star is going to be more careful from now on and not let children into his bed anymore because "it makes him vulnerable to false charges."

A few thoughts on this brainiac decision:

1. Referring to "not letting children into his bed" as "careful" is like referring to "wearing a parachute when jumping out of a plane" as "cautious."

2. If you are a grown man and the children are not your own, letting children into your bed doesn't make you "vulnerable to false charges" it makes you vulnerable to being a sick, sick freak.

3. Carnival's in Southern California can once again operate at full steam now that the "jury of Michael's peers" is finished with their civic duty and can return to work.

In all of this chaos, Michael has inspired me. I'm happy to share with you, my blogging brethren, that I have decided to no longer coat myself in honey and walk into a den of grizzly bears because the honey makes me vulnerable to acne.

Who's Bad?

1 comment:

Dennis Rutherford Lumpkins said...

some other things he should consider:
-ease up on the face surgeries. One of these days I am waiting for the wig to pop up, the eye balls to pop out and tounge to go nutz like in Twlight Zone the movie.
-quit the crotch grabbing on stage.I think it leads to temptation...
-lay off the wine/coke
-get some sun
-take iron pills
-work out (without little boys)
-Have P Diddy do a mix version of Thriller.