Friday, June 30, 2006

Stochastic Selections

Getting old is a state of mind. Tonight at 11:30 my wife and I made a run to Sonic and then over to our friends house. Most people our age aren't cruising the streets just before midnight. I find that fun.

A sore back is not a state of mind. It is a sore back. I have a sore back. It is primarily due to my surplusage stomach. Another possible conclusion is that I don't exercise all that much. If I had to put a number on it - I'd say 90% big boiler and 10% lack of exercise.

Top Five Sweet Teas within 20.3 miles of my home:

1. Kim's (hands down - the best ever!)
2. Chicken E
3. Rudy's (yes, now in Denton & just 20.3 miles from the crib)
4. McCalister's Deli
5. Babes

Our house has light, cream color carpet. Whoever puts cream color carpet in their house has a serious screw lose in their dome. Seriously, you've got two choices with cream carpet:
- become a carpet natzi and pay the steam cleaner guy to come out monthly or...
- have your carpet look nasty.
Those are it, folks.

When I get to heaven, the dude who invented the remote control is sadly enough in my top 50 for people who are getting a high five. I'd even get up off the couch in my heavenly mansion to do it!

Mike Cope's blog is the crack cocaine of cyberspace.

If I really had compassion, I'd send some of my 10 pair of shoes overseas to the person who has zero pairs. I'm serious.

Because our electric bill was $668.39, Kim has the house temperature set roughly on "the surface of the sun" ... I know most would call that move, responsible. I often refer to it as horrible.

Grant Boone is the next Rick Riley.

My buddy, Jay Holland (Dr. Jay) believes that the key to getting the gospel of Matthew is found in chapters 5 and 24-25. Those two bookends deal with the Pharisees missing the kingdom. After five weeks in Matthew 5 for my series on the Beatitudes, I'm starting to believe him.

If there is someone who loves Jesus more than my bride, I haven't met them yet.

I'm on iTunes now. I know, scary. Go to podcast and then search for quile.

Dallas (Mavericks) was up by 13 stinkin points with 6 minutes to play in Miami during game 3. Finish strong and the parade route goes from yellow legal pad to reality.

Speaking of yellow legal pads (you weren't ... but I was) - did you know that only 43% of legal pads are yellow.

If I could be anyone in Hollywood, it would be jerry Bruckheimer. Seriously, dude gets to be "creative on roids" and spend millions upon millions to see his dreams put on film.
Our entire family is pumped about the new Pirates flick. Possibly beyond pumped!

Some folks put the new roll of toilet paper so that the first sheet is coming over the top and others replace it so that the new roll is coming out from the bottom. I'm the former.

Many of you know that Brandon Scott really, really likes David Hasselhoff and that his career is really taking off (David's - not Brandon's) What you may not know is that I've actually sat in "Kit" You know you're way jealous BST!

I halfway believe that the Chinese will someday, take over the world. That is why I eat at Pei Wei and PF Changs as often as I can. Just in case.

Someone from Benin reads my blog daily. Now I know most of you are fairly up to snuff with your Benin facts...but just in case:

Present day Benin was the site of Dahomey, a prominent West African kingdom that rose in the 15th century. The territory became a French Colony in 1872 and achieved independence on 1 August 1960, as the Republic of Benin. A succession of military governments ended in 1972 with the rise to power of Mathieu KEREKOU and the establishment of a government based on Marxist-Leninist principles. A move to representative government began in 1989. Two years later, free elections ushered in former Prime Minister Nicephore SOGLO as president, marking the first successful transfer of power in Africa from a dictatorship to a democracy. KEREKOU was returned to power by elections held in 1996 and 2001, though some irregularities were alleged.

I'll stop here. Too many good things can quickly become a bad thing.

Have a good weekend. Or make one.


Kevin W said...

Whoa - this entry is a prime example of why blogging shouldn't be done after a late night Sonic run...! And about Benin, been there, done that, been tailed by Libyans in the process and got some neat Ibeji dolls. For a really cool taste of Benin, google "Ganvia," you'll be amazed at this town on stilts in the middle of a big lake.

Paige said...

Thanks for the sweet tea! You guys are crazy and we LOVE YOU!

Stephen Bailey said...

No Kevin, this entry is a prime example of what it's like to work with Joel Quile everyday!

Note to Kim: Don't forget to pick up Joels meds.

Brandon Scott said... are nuts. I misses me some a dat. Fo shizzle my nizzle.

Sam Middlebrook said...

Yes, but speaking of banana slugs, have you ever been to Kansas? It's kind of like when you get gum stuck in your hair, just different.

Joel Quile said...


Thirdly, that post of yours was freakin histerical! Reminds me of the time that Gopher on the Love Boat was hosting HGTV's HouseHunters. Anyway, turns out that sewer rats have incredible difficulty using weedeaters... So how is old Lee Green?

Sam Middlebrook said...

Age is irrelevant when you're Lee Green. It's like being Paul Bunyan, just without the hat, the plaid shirt, the axe, the size, the braun, the general skill and experience with forestry, or an ox named Blue.

But I'm glad you asked about the density of cardboard. It's amazing how some cardboard will float, yet cardboard will not. It's just one more instance where we, the people, get jacked by some fat-cat entreprenurial industry executive who plays a deadly game of "will it float" with his product.

It doesn't matter much, though, because when it all comes down it, none of really know how nmnay licks it takes to get to center of a tootsie roll pop - or an elephant for that matter - or, say, a 1967 Buick. That kind of licking can only be done by experienced professionals. DO YOU HEAR ME KIDS? DO NO TRY THIS AT HOME, leave it to the professional lickers who have spent years working their way up what those in the genre call "The Licking ladder", starting with things like a lollipop, and gently working their way up towards harder items such as oranges (w/out peel) and apples, and then try to lick to center of an orange (with peel) and say, a watermelon.

This is all governed by the international licking commission, who allows only the rarest of lickers to attempt things like elephants and Buicks.

There are, though, those mavericks - the rebels - the wild ones... who do extreme licking. They lick to the center of advanced objects (like the orange WITH the peel) while jumping out of airplaned and cliff diving.

By the way, did I mention that I really enjoy bacon?

That John Wayne, boy can he act.

Sam Middlebrook said...

I can't wait for your reply. It's like being on a railroad track in the East Indies with a cold glass of scissors.

Joel Quile said...


You know what this reminds me of?

One time I was walking down the street and a garbage truck with a bad set of brakes jumped the curb and pinned me into a brick mailbox, crushing most of my internal wait, that wasn't me.

So I'm at Jack-n-the-Box getting some of those low calorie deep fried tacos and Jose Canseco strolls in rocking a Prada man-purse. I didn't know he was Morman.

Germany might defeat Italy but it really depends on the whether Pluto is inside or outside of Neptune's orbit and if Steve Spencer eats all his broccoli.

Gotta run...T.O. (he's playing for Dallas now) is watching the kids and plus the Crocidile Hunter is on TV.

Sam Middlebrook said...

With T.O. watching the kids, you just can't go wrong. Most of the time, though, I let my waterelons cool in the freezer before I eat them.

Furthermore, Japan is more a state of mind than in it is a condiment, and I think that's where most people (understandably) get confused.

It's just a shame that Robert Van Winkle isn't blessing us with his obvious talent any more.

Randy & Kelly Vaughn said...

Ok you caught us..We are your readers in Benin..We are Kelly and Randy Vaughn, missionaries in Benin. I do not know if you remember me or not. I was Kelly Jeffrey at ACU...sure you remember Randy..he was really popular:) !!

We are fairly isolated over here and the blog thing has been great for us! We feel really connected and encouraged daily by reading blogs of our family and and your wife have become a part of that growing circle!

Blessings on your ministry!

Kelly Vaughn

MisterPopular said...

Thanks Kelly for your kind comments about me!

Living in Benin has made us miss Sonic. I'm thankful for bigger ice cubes here though...that great Sonic ice would just melt too fast over here. But it sure tastes good at home.

-MisterPopular (as my wife likes to call me)