Wednesday, May 11, 2005

Burning Up The "Pick Up Lines"

Today Mike Cope posted a great entry about his marriage with Diane. He "invited" me (and a few select others) to drop a few possible pickup lines to use at an Evangelism Conference. I have done just that in my blog today (didn't want to fill up Mike's entire comment section) and have added just a few other pick up lines that I've come across (or used?) over the years. Enjoy!

Alright Mike, you asked for them:

Joel's Top Ten Pick Up Lines At An Evangelism Conference:


10. Are you lost?

9. You know Jesus? Really? Me too!

8. Do you know the difference between making out and witnessing? (she replies: "no") Do you want to go witness with me?

7. Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven?

6. Is it a sin that you stole my heart?

5. My name is Will. God's Will.

4. I don't want to covet. I'm going to make you mine!

3. I picked David over Goliath!

2. Wanna go knock some doors?

1. You put the "cute" in persecution!


Other Pick Up Lines

Christian Ones

10. "I just don't feel called to celibacy."

9. "Did I tell you that my great-uncle was a personal friend of Billy Graham?"

8. "I don't see it myself, but people tell me I look like Michael W. Smith."

7. "What do you think Paul meant when he said, 'Greet everyone with a holy kiss'?"

6. "You have the body of Amy Grant and the soul of Mother Teresa." (DO NOT get this confused!)

5. "You know, I'm really into relationship evangelism."

4. "I'm pretty flexible--I don't think a woman should be submissive on the first date." 3. "Before tonight, I never believed in predestination..."

2. "Just looking at you makes me feel all ecumenical."

1. "I hear there's going to be a love offering tonight."


Pick Up Lines Used By Adam (to Eve)

10. "You know you're the only one for me!"

9. "Do you come here often?"

8. "Trust me, this was meant to be!"

7. "Look around, baby. All the other guys around here are animals!"

6. "I already feel like you're a part of me!"

5. "Honey, you were made for me!"

4. "Why don't you come over to my place and we can name some animals?"

3. "You're the girl of my dreams!" (Gen. 2:21)

2. "I like a girl who doesn't mind being ribbed!"

And the number one pick up line from Adam is:

1. "You're the apple of my eye!"


I recently came across an interesting statistic:

Men who were successful when they used the pickup line "Hi": 71%
Women who were successful when they used the pickup line "Hi": 100%


Other Pick Up Lines

"Was it love at first sight, or should I walk by again?"


"I lost my phone number. Can I have yours?"


"I'm new in town — could I get directions… to your place?"


"Can I check your tag?" (Checks tag on back of shirt) "I was right, Made in Heaven."


"You must be tired — you've been running through my mind all day."


"Do you come with a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes."


"If I told you that you had a nice body, would you hold it against me?"


"Can I buy you a drink so I look better?"


"Are you from Mars? 'Cause your moves are out of this world!"


"Are you a parking ticket? Because you have FINE written all over you."

"Who beamed you down from Planet Gorgeous?"

"Do you have a library card? Good, 'cause I want to check you out! "

"Are you from Greece? I thought all Goddesses were Greek."

"Your daddy must be a thief, 'cause he stole the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes."

"Miss December, right?"

"If I followed you home… would you keep me?"

"If this bar is a meat market, then you must be the prime rib!"


Top Ten From Romantic Movie Classics

1) Casablanca
“Was that cannon fire, or is it my heart pounding?” Ilsa in “Casablanca” with Ingrid Bergman and Humphrey Bogart. Warner Bros. 1942, directed by Michael Curtiz.

2)
The Public Enemy
“You’re a swell dish. I think I’m gonna go for you,” Tom in “Public Enemy” with James Cagney and Mae Clarke. Warner Bros. 1931, directed by William Wellman.

3)
A Guy Named Joe
“Everything wrong with you I like,” Captain Randall in “A Guy Named Joe” with Van Johnson and Irene Dunne. MGM 1944, directed by Victor Fleming.

4)
China Seas
“If you aren’t decent, boyfriend, you’ll do until something decent comes along.” Dolly in “China Seas” with Jean Harlow and Clark Gable. MGM 1935, directed by Tay Garnett.

5)
The Man Who Came to Dinner
“I guess you are sort of attractive, in a corn-fed sort of way. You can’t find yourself a poor girl falling for you if – well, if you threw in a set of dishes,” Maggie in “The Man Who Came To Dinner” with Bette Davis and Richard Travis. Warner Bros. 1942, directed by William Keighley.

6)
Across the Pacific
“We’re going to know each other eventually, why not now?” Rick in “Across the Pacific” with Humphrey Bogart and Mary Astor. Warner Bros. 1942, directed by John Huston and Vincent Sherman.

7)
Casablanca
“Here’s looking at you kid,” Rick in “Casablanca” with Humphrey Bogart and Ingrid Bergman. Warner Bros. 1942, directed by Michael Curtiz.

8)
Red Dust
“Mind if I get drunk with you?” Vantine in “Red Dust” with Jean Harlow and Clark Gable. MGM 1932, directed by Victor Fleming.

9)
Johnny Eager
“Oh, now don’t turn ordinary on me, I get tired of ordinary dames. And I don’t want to get tired of you,” Johnny in “Johnny Eager” with Robert Taylor and Lana Turner. MGM. 1943, directed by Mervyn Leroy

10)
The Public Enemy
“I'm not accustomed to riding with strangers,” Gwen. "We're not gonna be strangers," Tom in “Public Enemy” with Jean Harlow and James Cagney. Warner Bros. 1931, directed by William Wellman.


Well, there you have it! More than you asked. Some good. Some not so good. I've never been much of a pick up line guy. I just usually went, "Hey, I'm Joel. I don't think we know each other." And they either gave me their name and we'd start talking or they'd say, "let's keep it that way." and walk away.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...
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janet said...

LOVED your pickup lines, absolutely hilarious!

Here's one I just heard for your collection: Is your name Visa, cause you are everywhere I want to be.

Kerri said...

This stuff is great. I needed a good laugh today. And laugh I did!
Thanks!

Lauren said...

Joel,

You are out of control! This stuff was hilarious! Which ones did you use when Kim came along? Be blessed today.

Brandon Moore said...

Hey have really enjoyed the lines today, one of my personal favorites being a bible major and all is, "I don't believe in speaking in tongues, but I've got something else we could do with them."

Jenni said...

Hilarious!!!

Keith Brenton said...

I wonder if there's a blog in Jesus' pickup lines:

10) I'll make you fishers of men.
9) Leave the tax table to someone else.
8) I saw you under the tree and thought, now there's somebody!
7) Let the sinless cast the first stone.
6) You don't give the children's food to dogs.
5) Who do folks think I am?
4) Who do you think I am?
3) Can you see now? Men walking around like trees, huh? Let me try again.
2) Who touched my cloak?
1) Could you get me a drink of water, miss?